Chapter 69: The Frustrated Principal

"Principal Niu, I know you’ve long had enough of Qiu Hui. He throws his weight around the school, relying on his father’s position in the county education bureau. He’s even formed a little gang with a whiff of the underworld about it, calling himself the boss of Second High! How much longer can we tolerate this? As the principal, shouldn’t you be the true boss of Second High?"

Damn it! Who said I couldn’t stand Qiu Hui? I’ve been trying to curry favor with him, if anything! Principal Niu had heard some rumors of Qiu Hui’s misbehavior, but it was always just a little bullying—nothing to make a fuss about. No matter how undisciplined I am, I’d never stoop to competing with a student for dominance!

"So, in order to help you vent your frustration, to restore a clear blue sky to our school, I’m willing to take the punishment if necessary and teach him a lesson! Let him know the school isn’t a lawless place, and having connections at the education bureau doesn’t mean you can do as you please!"

Why does this sound so righteous? The school can’t be lawless, connections at home can’t excuse bad behavior—it all sounds so reasonable. But what’s this about venting my frustration? Damn, you want a fight and are trying to drag me into it? I’m not the boss, really I’m not!

"Principal, don’t worry about me. As a member of the school, it’s my duty to fight against bad influences. Sometimes, when it’s inconvenient for you to step in, I can…"

Honestly, I think you’re the real bad influence here! You just finished beating Zhang Peiyue, now you’re after Qiu Hui—rich kids, official’s kids, you beat them all. Are you leading a revolution? And you want to do it in my name, you rascal—"Enough! Shut your mouth!"

Do people usually consult the police before committing a crime? Do you even know what you’re saying? You’re discussing beating up another student with the principal, and nearly made me your accomplice!

"If you break school rules again, I’ll expel you, believe it or not!"

"Principal Niu, I know you won’t! Even if you seem cautious about those bad influences at school, I know you have a strong sense of justice deep down. You would never let a hero bleed and weep… Besides, the Minor Protection Law and the Education Law both say that a student’s right to education must be protected."

I’m learning so much with you around! Principal Niu rolled his eyes. In retrospect, it started out as criticism for turning in the exam early, but somehow the conversation twisted into beating up Qiu Hui, and now he’d been cast as the mastermind behind the scenes, dissatisfied with Director Qiu from the education bureau and secretly inciting Xiao Cheng to beat up Qiu Hui…

"Don’t worry, Principal Niu, I won’t breathe a word of this!"

"Hold on! I protest!"

In a conversation, both sides should speak according to their roles, status, and relationship—teacher and student, leader and subordinate. Otherwise, it just sounds awkward and leaves people confused. Principal Niu was definitely confused now. Clearly, he was the principal talking to a student, but this felt more like a plot between a ringleader and his henchman.

I’m the principal, I’m the principal, I’m the principal! Niu kept repeating to himself, trying to ward off the confusion. I’m the head of the school, the real boss—how can I allow someone like Qiu Hui to act tyrannically—wait, how did I start thinking that way?

"Dealing with Qiu Hui is inconvenient for you, Principal Niu, since you have to consider Director Qiu’s reputation. It’s better if I handle it," said Xiao Cheng, ever so understanding.

That’s just how straightforward I am.

"Shut up! Stop trying to spin me around!" Principal Niu slapped the desk and stood up. "You almost had me confused! I’ll handle Qiu Hui myself—you stay out of it!"

Xiao Cheng shut his mouth obediently.

Principal Niu felt much better after saying his piece, but something still felt off. When did this become all about Qiu Hui?

"The issue here is you! Xiao Cheng! Your actions are serious—not just fighting in class, but also giving unauthorized media interviews and tarnishing the school’s reputation! That alone is enough for disciplinary action. Don’t change the subject!"

Now he was finally back on track.

"I’m not asking you not to punish me!" Xiao Cheng’s face was as innocent as ever. "I’m just thinking for your sake! You see, it’s already a hassle for you to criticize and educate me—I might as well take all the blame at once and save you the trouble! I know I’ve caused you problems, but Qiu Hui isn’t exactly a saint. I give him a good beating to keep him in line—just like Zhou Chu eliminating the three scourges, right?"

Why does everything you say sound so reasonable?

"If you knowingly break the rules, I’ll expel you!"

"Principal, you don’t need to scare me, not with our relationship. The law doesn’t allow it. The worst you can do is recommend withdrawal, but if I refuse to leave, there’s nothing you can do. Write whatever you want in my file—my dad’s already in prison for murder, what do I care about a little stain? I just don’t want you to get upset over this; I hear your blood pressure’s high. So can’t we work something out? I’m definitely going to beat up Qiu Hui. You’d best just accept it calmly."

Calmly, my foot!

But thinking it over, dealing with a tough case like Xiao Cheng, who can’t be expelled, isn’t afraid of punishment, and whose only parent is in jail, is really hard on an honest educator like Principal Niu. He can’t hit him, can’t scold him, and if he so much as lays a finger on him, the boy would probably faint right there in the office. Niu frowned for a long time, then finally asked, "Do you really have to beat him?"

"I must! Anything less won’t satisfy the public’s outrage!"

"But you said you already beat him up last Tuesday and he didn’t even complain. Maybe that’s enough?"

"We must press the attack while the enemy is in retreat—we can’t let up for the sake of reputation! Principal Niu, honestly, I’m giving you face here. Otherwise, once a week until he graduates would be letting him off easy!"

Principal Niu swallowed his bitterness. "How about… just don’t do it at school, all right?"

"No way!" Xiao Cheng didn’t hesitate for a second. "It has to serve as a warning! Not only do I have to beat up Qiu Hui, but I also need to set an example, deter the riffraff, and bring back a clear sky to Second High!"

With you around, there’ll never be a clear sky! But in all seriousness, you’re putting me in a tough spot here…

"Don’t worry, he probably won’t tell you even after he gets beaten up. When he goes home, he’ll keep it quiet!"

So you’ve thought this all through, have you? Principal Niu could barely breathe. A kid of fourteen or fifteen had managed to corner him, the principal, without a word left to say. The reasons for beating up a classmate were so thorough, there was no way to refute them. The principal, for all his authority, was helpless—if students aren’t afraid of you, there’s nothing you can do!

Why is being a principal so humiliating?

"How about this—we make a deal: the school won’t punish you, and you don’t beat up Qiu Hui. How does that sound?"

"I couldn’t possibly accept that! You should punish me as you see fit, criticize me as you ought. You can’t bend the rules just because you appreciate my talent or like me! Don’t worry, I won’t hold a grudge. In my mind, you’re still the strict and impartial principal!"

Principal Niu felt like crying—who the hell likes you? Whoever likes you is a fool!

——————

Does this scene seem familiar? Remember, this is an absurdist skit, exaggerated for effect—don’t take it too seriously, and certainly don’t imitate it.

Some friends have said that one chapter a day isn’t enough, and I get it. Compared to those who crank out three or four a day, not counting bonus chapters, my pace is rather slow. But honestly, if I just wrote filler—irrelevant, face-slapping, bragging scenes unrelated to the main story—I could easily pad things out to two or three chapters a day without thinking. But I’ve never done that. Since I claim that Old Dao’s books are different, I have to be responsible for my work, right?

Let me be honest: for Chapter 80, there’s a section with Xiao Cheng’s self-criticism. Friends who’ve read my earlier works know I’m proud of those scenes. That chapter took me three days to write. For just two thousand characters, I scrapped nearly ten thousand. So, please understand—one chapter a day may be slow, but I promise quality.

After all, this is a protagonist with an IQ of 300, a book that claims to recharge your intelligence. If I wrote five chapters and ten thousand words a day, wouldn’t that be cheating? How many years did Lanling Xiaoxiaosheng spend writing "The Plum in the Golden Vase"? How many years did Cao Xueqin spend writing "Ultraman"? If they’d written two chapters a day, would we have masterpieces like "The Calabash Brothers" or "Black Cat Detective" today? Am I right? Finally, shamelessly, I beg for a recommendation, a reward—it’s Monday!